The Sexiest Videogames of All Time: An Armchair Arcade Feature Series

Bill Loguidice's picture

Despite a certain film critic endlessly proclaiming otherwise, videogames are art. Unfortunately, like any other art form, certain videogame creations are nothing more than quick cash-ins that aspire to nothing more than to pander to the masses. Sadly, this artistic failing too often also extends to videogame critique, with deep analyses and provocative topics side-stepped or avoided completely.

Luckily, because of the unique make-up of Armchair Arcade, we're under no such critical artistic restrictions. As a result, we are free to explore some of these more provocative topics in a way that's both thoughtful and fun, and do so over an extended time period.

In one of the first such series we'll tackle, we ask the simple, yet provocative question, "What makes a particular videogame sexy?" In this ongoing series, we'll explore the many intriguing approaches game designers have taken over the years to make their games more sensual, not just with increasingly detailed graphics, but also with romantic and seductive gameplay. While some of the games we'll be looking at are unabashedly low brow, displaying their raw sexuality like a badge of honor, other games in contrast are remarkably subtle, often downplaying their suggestive themes. This is of course the type of nuance you'd expect to find in art.

Your series authors will be me, Matt Barton, Chris Kennedy, Al Vallely, and Christina Loguidice. Each of these individuals will be responsible for crafting their own entries on a particular game, giving each new piece a fresh perspective on the original question. Armchair Arcade will be rolling out the articles in this series at a rate of approximately one per week, starting with my entry on Dragon's Lair. The rest of the dozens of entries will be revealed over time, like an appropriately slow seduction.

Look for the first entry in The Sexiest Videogames of All Time soon. Read them, enjoy them (or not), but, perhaps most important of all, let's hear those comments and help us spread the word!

Comments

Salty Pretzels
Salty Pretzels's picture
Offline
Joined: 02/28/2012
Art or craft? You decide!

Poor Roger Ebert. He played the Sega Activator and reviewed Cosmology of Kyoto (a game) when I was still learning how to count without using my toes (and playing Duke Nukem II, very educational). But he gets a lot of smack for writing about games in an "unflattering way". Are games art? Eeeyup. Is dubstep art? GOD, NO! But what do you think? You see beauty is in the eye of the beholder.

n/a
Bill Loguidice
Bill Loguidice's picture
Offline
Joined: 12/31/1969
Not an art debate, just a statement of fact
Salty Pretzels wrote:

Poor Roger Ebert. He played the Sega Activator and reviewed Cosmology of Kyoto (a game) when I was still learning how to count without using my toes (and playing Duke Nukem II, very educational). But he gets a lot of smack for writing about games in an "unflattering way". Are games art? Eeeyup. Is dubstep art? GOD, NO! But what do you think? You see beauty is in the eye of the beholder.

I think it goes a bit deeper than that. Sure, you can have chauvinism for your chosen medium - we all do, as deeply identifying with things is a very human trait - but it also shows a remarkable lack of understanding and empathy when you're unable to acknowledge something as art that's clearly art. In Ebert's case, this is also someone who is otherwise extremely talented, intelligent and influential, so it's particularly disappointing. I believe that any medium that inspires well-reasoned debate on the subject of "is it art?," is art, plain and simple. I told Mr. Ebert as much, as well, but he's certainly heard and dismissed that argument countless times before.

You know, I bet he probably believes it's art by now as well, but he also loves the easy rise he gets out of people, which in turns brings more attention to his brand, which he's masterful at maintaining... And that is truly said with respect.

n/a
Matt Barton
Matt Barton's picture
Offline
Joined: 01/16/2006
I think it's really

I think it's really unfortunate that they're still called GAMES, since so many people have a preconceived notion that games are for kids. Nothing "serious" or "deep" could possibly come out of a something that's "just a game." Over the years, of course, developers have tried to call them different things--"digital entertainment", "interactive movie", etc., but I don't think we'll ever get away from that designation...It's like comics. To the average person, those are something only children and immature men are into.

I think one advantage of talking about sexy games might be that it raises the bar a bit. Games aren't just for children; here's some really sexy ones...Hey, it worked for anime. :)

n/a
clok1966
Offline
Joined: 01/21/2009
I have alwasy thouhgt of ART

I have alwasy thouhgt of ART as something i want to look at becuse somebody see's it differntly then me. I'm a comic book nerd... and I THINK the art in some of those books is incredible. Berry Smith, Steve Dillon, Kirby, Berrnie Wrighston, Will eisner, man there are so many. Dont get me wrong, there is alot of generic crap.. but if you think about it.. companies mass produce some pattern and put it in a frame and sell it as a art for $4.99 while i dont consider it much, its still art in the simpelest way. ART takes creativity, and being able to see it sometimes the hard part. Jackson Pollock is an abstract artist, His paintings are drips of paint.. his "NO.5" was sold for $140,000,000... to become the worlds most expensice painting in 2006 (if this is stil true today i have no idea)... do i consider it art, yes.. do i like it at all, NO!!!!! i think anybody can drip paint on a canvas.. and i will never see it more thant that.. but I still understand its art. Watch a movie like Hidden Tiger, Flying Dragon.. (No im not a fan of the movie).. but soemof the stuff they do is done so well, its ART in my eyes.. the color blending, the movements.. facanating to watch, even if i consider the movee horrible...

As for video games, i remeber the first time i saw the "last Ninja" on my c-64 the look, how it all worked.. it was art in my eyes.. how they pushed that machine to make that game. If paint is art, pixels can be too.. its how you arange them and make them look. Hecek that game is teh purest form of art in my opinion.. the Look, the music, the touches like the guards commiting Sepaku if you got past them.... it all came toghter into something aht was fun ot look at, listen to.. and play.

Art is something poeple admire for its look or creativity.. Video games are visual.. so they have to be ART.

As for sexy games.. I havnet had much interst in them.. not becuase the idea isnt interesting, but so far the exacution has been lacking. Mine consist of COBRA MISSION (bad), some old atari 2600 games ( horribly bad) a couple on the 3Do.. (bad).. To be honest, strip poker is about teh only ones worht playing .. the game is good, and sinec you are not playing for real money, at least a naked female give you areason to really try. I look at the WITCHER.. i heard it was a good RPG.. and it felt it was.. I had never herd about the "cards" when i bought it.. I was almost thinking i picked the wrong game when one came up. I must admit i felt a bit like it was made by "horny 25 year old who never had a gf"... Of course my opinion on that wuld have been different when i was 25. Porn is evrywhere now, the novelty of it in games is long gone.. nothing wrong with sexy, but in most game its geared to men.. seems a bit one sided now days.. in the past maybe not..but now.. i just dont know.

So for me Strip Poker III on the Amiga way back was about as sexy as i can think a game was.. As why, well it was naked girls.. the pinical of sexy for me.. you start with them clothed and work your way down.. so there is anticipation, desire.... and an edn resualt worth playign for.

Bill Loguidice
Bill Loguidice's picture
Offline
Joined: 12/31/1969
Yes, but...
clok1966 wrote:

As for sexy games.. I havnet had much interst in them.. not becuase the idea isnt interesting, but so far the exacution has been lacking. Mine consist of COBRA MISSION (bad), some old atari 2600 games ( horribly bad) a couple on the 3Do.. (bad).. To be honest, strip poker....

Ah, but that's the key difference--sex games versus sexy games. Just like there's a difference between a "sexy" film, like say a James Bond film and a porn film, there's a difference in the approach we're taking. We're covering the sexy in "regular" games (more or less)...

n/a
clok1966
Offline
Joined: 01/21/2009
ah i see
Bill Loguidice wrote:
clok1966 wrote:

As for sexy games.. I havnet had much interst in them.. not becuase the idea isnt interesting, but so far the exacution has been lacking. Mine consist of COBRA MISSION (bad), some old atari 2600 games ( horribly bad) a couple on the 3Do.. (bad).. To be honest, strip poker....

Ah, but that's the key difference--sex games versus sexy games. Just like there's a difference between a "sexy" film, like say a James Bond film and a porn film, there's a difference in the approach we're taking. We're covering the sexy in "regular" games (more or less)...

well then i await seeing what you have planned, i must admit I am wondering what you will cover. There doesnt seem to be much in the sexy game area.. but I may be wrong. Of course i guess almost any fanatasy game with a Female avatar can be considered sexy as far few dress them in anything but a chainmail bra and thong.. When i was younger i would have found that sexy but its so common now i dont really think of it that way i guess. But i see where you are going now.. not Sex, but sexy :) should be intersting.

clok1966
Offline
Joined: 01/21/2009
ah i see
Bill Loguidice wrote:
clok1966 wrote:

As for sexy games.. I havnet had much interst in them.. not becuase the idea isnt interesting, but so far the exacution has been lacking. Mine consist of COBRA MISSION (bad), some old atari 2600 games ( horribly bad) a couple on the 3Do.. (bad).. To be honest, strip poker....

Ah, but that's the key difference--sex games versus sexy games. Just like there's a difference between a "sexy" film, like say a James Bond film and a porn film, there's a difference in the approach we're taking. We're covering the sexy in "regular" games (more or less)...

well then i await seeing what you have planned, i must admit I am wondering what you will cover. There doesnt seem to be much in the sexy game area.. but I may be wrong. Of course i guess almost any fanatasy game with a Female avatar can be considered sexy as far few dress them in anything but a chainmail bra and thong.. When i was younger i would have found that sexy but its so common now i dont really think of it that way i guess. But i see where you are going now.. not Sex, but sexy :) should be intersting.

Comment viewing options

Select your preferred way to display the comments and click "Save settings" to activate your changes.